there's so much i wanna update but im just too tired to type cause alot of things happened in school nd it was so fun & hiliarious.

anyways, today there was alot of things that happened too which were real exciting. but i'll just blog what happened after school today.. soooo right, i went to plaza sing with anna to supposedly get the materials for the costumes for the talent time. nd then alot of things happened there too. nd i dont feel like talking about it again cause im really tired. nd then anna's at my house now having dinner nd like her mom's gonna pick her up later. okay im so tired. nd i wasted my time at p.s ahh nevermind at least i know i tried. i stood around there for like 4 long hours. im sooo exhausted. like while typing this i just feel like sleeping on my key board. i think im falling asleep soon. im so tired. anyways, i just had like a nap in the car nd i my dream was what happened on the phone in p.s with leanne. its like this heavy thing on my mind. nd i guess you can say im some what quite frustrated. i mean, everybody is. who's not. nobody. anyways, im so freaking dead tired.

i dont wanna update about alot of stuff. alot of stuff. im too exhausted.

im very scared about whats gonna happen on stage tomorrow. i dreamnt about it twice. nd i dont know how to explain. but its not about what you're gonna think im talking about. its just that i know that nobody understands me. nd i find it quite hard. or maybe its just in my head.

i think im losing my memory, ahh shit maybe its cause of the alc or something. but seriously i didnt drink it yesterday what. only like the day before yesterday. gosh, cant wait cant wait.

jiyin, i cant wait! but i'll wait for you. oh yah, you know about the thing you called me today, about buying those things. haha i guess you bought them already. cant wait!

oh yah, i sorta went out with jiyin yesterday in somewhat way right dearie, so funny you 'siao ja boh'. remember.

i had gastric today again.. cause i hate to eat breakfast. my stomach lining is being burned away too. my stomach lining is getting thinner every morning. its being burned away by too much gastric juices. i think im having gastric again.. i dont know but its like i dont even have the appetite to eat. so even if i wanted the dumb gastric to go away its no use, i dont even wanna eat. i dont even feel hungry. i just feel so tired. i feel very weird. like i wanna die. but nah.

anyways, we got back our report cards today. all six of us arent going to the same class together. jiyin nd i are quite scared that we're not in the same class. she got higher than me by like i think 4% so its highly likely that she wont be going to the same class. cause i'll prolly be going to the last class or something. i regret. the report book scratched my arm.. nd the wound turned yellow then red. i didnt even know until i was scratching it nd it stang like shit.

yesterday, we were all talking nd then there was some emo shit song playing on the stupid class radio nd then i started to tear. cause there was alot of things i started to think about nd regret alot. there are just mainly two major things..

1) i didnt study hard enough, i slacked like shit hell knows, i played alot, i treated sec one as pri one, i suffered alot in the end.

2) that person, cause i think i caused that person quite an amount of pain & sadness. im sorry.

damn i just remembered, i was too tired nd i didnt wanna type anymore or something like that. nd then now im like.. eh why am i like typing still. oh no.. maybe im really losing my memory. i think its the thing. its hard to stop, cause its nice.

to leanne; we acted really stupid. i understand what you were trying to say. call me when you see this asap.